If you’re on social media, as most are nowadays, you’ve probably seen or heard several commonly misused therapeutic terms. Out of the various therapeutic terms, some of the most common ones that I’ve noticed are the following: narcissist, gaslighting, and trauma bonding. While these terms can be more readily understood by someone who is familiar with mental health jargon, they can also be vastly misunderstood and misused. This is especially true by the way they are discussed on social media platforms. Now on to the clarification of these terms.
Narcissist
Have you ever been with a peer or walked around in day to day life and heard the phrase “They’re such a narcissist”? While it can be used as a loose description to describe someone self-absorubed (think Narcissius from mythology, who would stare at their reflection), being a narcissist has a much deeper meaning that goes beyond self-absorption. Narcissistic Personality Disorder is classified as a personality disorder in the DSM-5 and comes “with functional impairment, difficulty managing emotions, impulsive behaviors and lack of empathy.” Typically these symptoms have been pervasive and consistent throughout a person’s lifetime. They have serious impacts on their relationships with others.
Gaslighting
“They’re gaslighting you” or “don’t be gaslit” is a phrase that has been used often in social media. Gaslighting goes beyond two people or a group having a different recollection of a conversation and goes beyond a disagreement. It’s not saying that you ordered a lemonade, but the server thought you said sprite. It is not asking for a time to meet a friend and you both remember different times. Gaslighting is a type of psychological abuse and manipulation that leads the victim to question their own mental sanity and grasp of reality. This method is used to hurt the victim with intention. The intention that fuels gaslighting is for the abuser to make the victim “feel like they can’t trust their own memory, perception or even their own mental stability”
Trauma bonding
This happens to be a term that I’ve heard in misuse often. Common examples include “we’re trauma bonding” when friends are sharing about hard experiences, or “we’re trauma bonded” when people have experienced a difficult time together. And while trauma bonding can seem comforting, superficially, it’s truthfully a term that has a much deeper meaning. A trauma bond is a psychological phenomenon that is a response to an abusive dynamic. It is a “connection between an abusive person and the individual they abuse. It typically occurs when the abused person begins to develop sympathy or affection for the abuser.”
A great example of a real trauma bond is in The Handmaid’s Tale, where the captured women begin to feel sympathy and even affection for their captors. It’s complicated. They care for them on some level while still holding deep resentment and regret. It’s a much more complex type of dynamic that can be difficult to break.
Now that these terms have been clarified and fact checked, this can aid you in understanding the depth and deeper meaning behind commonly misused mental health terms. The more we grow in our knowledge and accurate understanding of others’ experiences, the more we can help those struggling with dynamics involving narcissists. We can also support those experiencing gaslighting. This clearer understanding of therapeutic terms also helps us better support people who are dealing with trauma bonds and guide them towards getting help.
If you or anyone you know is in need of counseling services, please reach out to Tx Harmony Counsling. You can give us a call at 832-352-1600 or reach out to us through our website HERE. We look foreward to working with you!
